To get the life you want takes tactics and strategies.
Today you hear a lot about mindfulness, being present and self-reflection.
All good things, but I think we hear a bit too much about staying present and being passive.
To me that’s half the battle, that’s defense.
Analyzing whats making you unhappy, being present with it and looking at it to take the charge out of the negative emotions are useful defensive tactics when something is bothering you.
Re-framing negative emotions is a terrific tactic, but again, by the time you’re wrestling with negative emotions and psychic pain.. you’re playing defense.
I want your offense to be so good, that you’re on the defensive as little as possible.
That means making the structural changes to create the lifestyle you want.
Lets say you get stuck up and stabbed by some dumb thug. You are now seriously on the defensive in the worst way possible. You’re fighting for your life. You could stay with the moment, and be present, and feel the sensations of the knife in your body…
But that’s probably not the best idea. The best idea is to take action by taking the knife out and going on the offensive as fast and ferociously as possible until you either open enough room to run away or neutralize your attacker.
Ideally you want to run from an attack before it happens, or strike first and strike hard. Because the time you’re playing defense, you’re in big trouble.
The reality is, in life, just as in sports, the best defense is a good offense.
When I was a kid I only played offense because I wanted to be upfront and scoring. And would only run back to defense if our team was in trouble.
I have the same mentality today…
Staying taking down goals
Staying connected to my inner circle.
I stay in it to win it.
And if I have a problem, I keep kicking in the door until the handles come off.
I don’t sit their making sense of my failures by meditating on them.
I’d rather impose my will on the world until I get what I want.
I think it’s crucial that you do that same
That you create a lifestyle and a mentality where you run on positive state.
That means positive:
Look at how little kids live, they have so many things they’re excited to do, they can’t wait to start the day and have fun.
Mindfulness is great as a tool for understanding yourself, and being able to discharge negative emotions. But you have to get out there and put in effort and create positive emotions
All these things make a massive difference. You can’t meditate away the negative effects of neglecting those areas.
Creating a positive reality and thinking positive will do more for your well-being then all your meditation efforts combined…
Introversion, being self-aware, being mindful, living in the present are all good to have on defense. But you can’t live your life on defense, not if you want to win. You need to be out there scoring points to win. And by win I mean being happy, because the man with the most joy is the man who wins the game of life.
You need to start with offense…
Being extroverted, social and positive
Being aware of others and your environment as opposed turning into your own thoughts
Adding value to interactions
Trying hard and caring about the results you achieve
Living in the future and all of things you’re going to accomplish and being excited about those wins and that potential
If you feel like you’ve been sold into playing defense and are being strangled by it…
Step out onto the court and start playing offense and getting some points.